A few years ago, one morning, I turned on the television before putting on my glasses. The TV was tuned to Turner Classic Movies and my myopic eyes told me I was watching some kind of plane battle scene.
“These actors look really funny,” I thought before finding my glasses and highlighting the world.
There was a reason the actors looked funny. It turned out that they weren’t about people but about dolls. The movie was “Thunderbirds Are Go”, a 1966 British film that used dolls, or maybe puppets, instead of people, which was a huge relief as I would hate to think of human beings looking like these puppets.
Something similar happened the other day when I turned on the TV and saw an advertisement for people practicing in front of a large mirror where it looked like there was a miniature person standing there. inside the mirror screaming at them.
“You can do it!” “Feel it!” “You got that! The little mirror person barked as she exercised as well.
We’ve all seen a movie or had a nightmare about looking in the mirror and seeing someone other than you looking back. These are usually horror movies, which is understandable because the idea of having another person living inside your mirror isn’t exactly the stuff of fairy tales (other than the mirror in the mirror). wicked witch in “Snow White”). But I had never seen a mirror with a real person inside while I was awake.
Intrigued and a little horrified, I researched the product. It’s a real thing, and their website says Magic Mirror customizes workouts for you. If you like weight lifting, you will be paired with a trainer who will pump up those biceps. If dancing is your thing, you’re in luck. Yoga? Uh-huh. Boxing? That too.
I guess the little person in the mirror is skinny on you, the athlete, and will help you achieve your fitness goals almost like he or she is in the room with you. What I guess he or she is sort of.
I can see the call. No more driving to the gym in bad weather. Don’t be embarrassed anymore when you can’t keep up with the rest of the class. No longer worry about having the right outfit or being the oldest / fittest / slowest in the class.
All of this is not cheap. The product itself costs around $ 1,500, plus installation costs. On top of that, there is a monthly fee for all of these exercise classes.
I guess the talking mirror gained popularity during the pandemic when gyms weren’t an option but eating everything in the kitchen was. Add Uber Eats and can order any high calorie meal you want – with French fries – day or night, and it was obvious that a major problem was on the horizon. As the old saying goes, if you want to dance, sooner or later you will have to pay the band. And the Uber driver.
I like the idea of having individualized workouts in the comfort of your own living room, but I have to say that the miniaturized instructor scares me a little. I’d be afraid he or she would pull away from telling me to do knee bends and veer into a darker world and start ordering me to rob banks or talk to my boss.
Suppose the coach is tired of training and demands to be let out of the mirror so that he can lead a normal life? In my house?
Or worse, they might start making rude comments about my form, pound weights, and crappy workout clothes before suggesting that I give up because I’m clearly never going to go back. They are also probably able to tell when the user is relaxing instead of sweating. I’m sure there are most likely monthly weigh-ins involved, which all add up to, “I think I’ll save my $ 1,500 and stay with quiet mirrors, thank you.”
Because when it comes to mirrors, silence is really golden. Other than the Evil Witch Mirror, of course.
Nell Musolf is a freelance writer who lives in Mankato with her husband and two dogs. She can be reached at [email protected].